date, gender and otherkinness?????
Okay so I have a history with otherkin and alterhuman stuff, I used to identify as a faun when I was like 14 and I also kinned pinkie pie. I stopped after a while because I got tired of labels but I've continued to feel unhuman in various ways. Last year I got back into the furry community and it's been quite Awesome Sauce. I also have been getting trans-er (this is related). Sometimes I feel naked because I feel like I should have a tail. I look in the mirror sometimes and for a second I'm surprised that i don't have one. I feel more dysphoria related to having human skin and a body than I do related to gender, but my gender dysphoria has also been getting worse lately.
There's no 'goal' or 'standard' for nonbinary people. You can't pass as nonbinary. My gender is not human and my body cannot contain it. I don't know what my gender is, but I do know that if I had to choose between top surgery + hrt and having a tail, I'd choose the tail. My Mind Self has cat-like ears. I feel them flip back when I'm upset sometimes. All this stuff is related somehow. Whatever does it mean...
Idk. I've never felt very connected to my body even as a child. A lot of that was a trans thing, but some of it is also The Other thing. I think I was on the right track when I was 14. I don't think I'm a faun or pinkie pie, but i'm something inhuman in some way. People can tell sometimes. idk i'm a wee little freak of some kind. It sounds like i'm a therian or otherkin or something but idk what animal so. ANyway that's my Struggle. my brain has I Want To Have A Tail disorder and actually its kind of silly and fun when i am not dispairing over my Human Form. probbaly also has something to do with the likely autism and sensory issues. having skin is awful guys